Wednesday, June 09, 2010

Okay I feel so excited and yet so blah at the same time. This packing carp has really been wearing me out super bad! On a side note though, my friend Jeremy has offered to pay for me to get a clinic pregnancy test done so I will know if I am pregnant before I leave for Ohio. I am really excited and I am going to go in Monday morning and have it done. I have to have blood drawn which really sucks, but it will be completely worth it to know in the end! Because when we move this weekend it will take all day to load the trailer, all day to drive and another day to unload the trailer. So basically, if I am not pregnant, it is ok to hurt myself doing this, if I am pregnant, I'm gonna wimp out and try to get other people to help us, because there is nooo way I am taking any chances! I want a baby soo bad! I want to be a mommy. Plus I have already started to lower my medications, which has been hell already. So if for some reason I am showing signs of early pregnancy I wouldn't know, because my meds are throwing my body for a loop for me! Coco is doing much better, she can walk, although it is kinda funny. I'm really proud of her though, I though I was gonna have to get her a little doggy wheel chair and squeeze her twice a day so she could pee! I am supposed to keep her on restriction though until the end of July at least. That is a fun game to play, because she thinks she needs to be where mommy is at all times!

Monday, June 07, 2010

We should be moving within the next week. Things are going very well for me in my family. I have a ton more responsibility on my shoulders now with my dad being gone. I have been doing lots of packing, cleaning, and selling of my moms stuff. Also at the same time I have been trying to get pregnant. In two weeks I should be able to know if I am pregnant via test, and a week or so after that I will know if I miss my period. I am excited, nervous, and anxious all at the same time. I have been extra careful with my body to increase my chances of getting pregnant. I have been trying to keep my body the right temperature and not to lift excessive amount of weight. Which has been a struggle because we have been packing and running a yard sale. I believe I felt myself ovulate last week, so I hope that we have some success! My toes look really terrible. Both nails have dried blood underneath them and look really bad. I have clipped off a bunch of them. I have been packing all my baby clothes to go to Ohio and man I have a lot! lol. I think I have serious mommy shopping issues. I really want to have a girl. I will come to accept it if it happens to be a boy, but my heart is truly set on a girl. I am not 100 percent sure Justin is ready to be a dad, but I know I am ready to be a mom. My mom has been super supportive of everything. I started lowering my medication about a week ago. It already has begun to effect me. I have had a couple of anxiety attacks already, and I'm already more easily agitated. But I have to do it for the sake of the baby. Because if I am pregnant right now and don't know it, which is possible, the medication can severely hurt the baby during development. So even if I get a bit crazy, it is worth is to have a healthy baby. I am just really lucky to have great friends like Melissa and Brandon, who have been helping me a lot lately. Justin and Jeremy have been busting their butts working at Trolli, so I don't see them much, but they are making good money :)