Today I posted my status on Facebook as this: "There was a point in time in my life where I swore I NEVER wanted to be a parent. Going through pregnancy and childbirth, plus the cost and hassle of raising a child, that wasn't for me. It was something I never wanted to do, and was pretty sure I was going to stick with that choice. The older I got the more those reasons for not having children seemed less important, and I slowly became more and more envious of friends and strangers with their children and babies. Although it was a surprise when I finally did become pregnant, I CHOSE to become a parent. In all honesty it is by far the best thing I have ever done. I have always been a giving person, and giving my all to this little guy has been some of the best memories of my life, and I can't wait to make more."
This is the truth. During my pregnancy I had a lot of doubts and fears about becoming a parent. There is so much I want to do and give to my son, he is such a amazing person already. Every time I look into his eyes I swear I see so much. He is full of joy and amazement, and that just touches me deep in my soul. I felt a connection with my son from the first time I got to hear his heartbeat. That was the moment it became real to me. The first moment I realized I was going to become a mom. I didn't always want to be a mom and from time to time those old fears came back to haunt me. Would I lose who I am because now I am MOM? Would I have any time for me or the things I enjoy? Would we be able to afford anything nice anymore? It is crazy because so little and so much has changed. Did I lose who I was? Nope. I gained to who I was. I am so much more now, and my favorite title is Mommy. Do I have time for me? Yep. I have the most wonderful son who is easy going, and gives me time to shower, play on the computer, get chores done, and relax. Plus my son has a pretty amazing Daddy too, who helps so much. Did this baby suck up all our money? Not even. I took up couponing, so his basic needs like diapers and wipes are met cheaply. I bought his clothes and lot of his toys used, so tons of money was saved there. Our biggest expense is all the money we plan to spend on Christmas, but we want to spend that. So has anything changed? We eat out a little less, we go to bed a little earlier, and we smile and laugh a lot more.
Did I make the right choice? Heck yeah. This is the best thing I have ever made, and I wouldn't change a thing about him.