30 Things I want my Kids to know about Me Part 2

In my last blog I answered question number one. Lets see what we can answer tonight.

Number Two:

Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears.

Well, one fear I have is catching on fire. Not a huge fear, but when I was growing up my mom always had candles lit every where, and I had super long hair. Needless to say I came very close on serveral occasions to catching my hair on fire. Hasn't happened that I know of but still scared. A second fear is of squishing bugs. When I was a little kid my grandparents had a half in ground finished basement, and I dumped out a mason jar full of pens once. Where there was what looked to be a baked bean in the jar, so being a little kid I squeezed it between my fingers to see if it was. Turns out it was a super dead june bug and was super crunchy. Ever since squishing bugs freaks me out. Then my third fear isn't that scarey, it is a fear of running out of stuff. For example say food or toilet paper. I grew up in a house of surplus, there was always more then enough of everything. But then in my late teen years I spent time between being homeless and shacking with friends and learned what it was truely like to live without these things. I lived with one family who own ONE bath towel. I remember not having any money to buy food, using pocket change to buy roman so we could just eat something. Empty cabinets scare me. Deeply.

 

Number Three

Describe Your Relationship With Your Spouse:

This is a awesome question. I am glad this one was on the list because I don't feel like I get to ever talk about this. I love Justin and I love him in a way I haven't ever loved anyone else. He is the first man I have ever had a mature love with. I don't need him to feel complete about myself, but him being here does just that. Just being in the same room makes me a happier person. He is not perfect by any means, but he tries and he loves with all of his heart. We don't give up every time we get into a fight, we work it out, fix it, and keep going. The best things in life are that way. You ever see some one who has been driving the same car since the 80's? Thats because they know the best things are worth working on when they break down. Justin drives me crazy, but I love him for it. He is a child at heart and it keeps me young. He is always pushing me to follow my dreams and go the distance. I have never met some one so supportive. I really feel like this is the kind of love that lasts forever.

 

Number Four

List 10 things you would tell your 16 year old self, if you could:

1. DO NOT use that hair brush at the skating rink.

2. Talk to your friends more.

3. Reconsider trying bipolar meds.

4. I know you wont believe even yourself saying this, but he isn't the dream come true you think he is.

5. Take more pictures of Mickey and Holden.

6. Enjoy highschool, it is only four years, and Newton High ROCKS.

7. Take more of an interest in Gardening and Cooking at home.

8. Never stop writing, whether it is journals, books, stories, poetry, let it out.

9. Have faith in yourself, because you can do it, all by yourself.

10. See a gyno. It could change everything.